Thursday, March 15, 2007

Mom using her evil powers for good!

Emails from my Mom are always interesting. Well, emails and all conversations. Nobody can say my Mom is boring! So this morning on the way to work I call Mom and wake her up. She says she was taking a little nap but really, who takes a little nap at 8:20 in the morning? Nice try Mom!!

The first thing she asks me is if I got her email yet. It seems she sent me an email at 2:11AM! When I got to work, I checked my email and first she tells me that she has just finished cutting the dogs fur and, "He is not a pretty sight." Poor thing! He's an old man and gets grouchy if the cat walks by him anytime after 7PM, which is his designated bed time. Can you imagine the horror he had to endure while Mom cut his fur all night long?

Next, she informs me that she's going to be doing some lobbying at the state capital, Salem. I, for one, think Mom would be a great lobbyist! I have no idea what she's lobbying for or against but Mom has the skill of nagging down to a T. And we all know that nagging yields a certain power.

Seen here with Liz and Mickey, Disneyland has an auto-switch off policy regarding nagging.

For example, one time when Aimee and I were around 8 and 9, we were driving by my Uncle Scott's apartment when she saw the door was open. So she did a U turn and went back to see what's up (I guess she knew he was gone). She ended up following two guys out of the apartment, down the stairs and into the parking lot with one hand on her hip, the other one with a finger wagging in the air. And her mouth? WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH WAH

The thieves did their best to leave the apartment with my Uncle's personal items in their arms as quickly as possible. One of them finally turned around and looked at Mom and pointed a rifle at her. Without skipping a beat, she said "What, are you going to shoot me? My two daughters are in the car right there and are watching every move you make. Do you want to leave them motherless??" *sigh* I mean, MOM, they could have left us motherless! Or even worse, shot us all!!

Long story short, they left, she called the police and all ended well. At least I think I did. Well, we didn't get shot so that's good enough for me.

The only times nagging didn't worked out for Mom is when Aimee was supposed to clean her room. For some reason, Aimee passed out on the bed or floor whenever she was supposed to clean her room. Amazingly, some of my stuff would end up on her side of the room whenever that happened. WEIRD! No amount of nagging kept Aimee from losing consciousness or keeping her room clean. To this day she claims she's allergic to cleaning (this includes doing dishes, it makes her legs itch).

Anyway, I think Mom's finally found her niche. She's found something that will make good use of at least one of her finely honed evil powers!


aimee said...

You know, I wonder now if I was just overwhelmed by the utter magnitude of it all... I would sit there slowly moving things from one side to another, leaning against my bed and....
I would wake up to a loud voice asking if it was finished. In a panic, I would throw things in a closet or anything with doors. They don't hold much.

MOM said...

Ok so am I good or what? As soon as I can I'll get a picture of peanut and send it to you but I cna't figure out how to get the pictures onto my computer and in a file sooooo siiiggghhhhh. Aimee...she has finally found a way to clean. She moves! Some people spring clean, not Aimee. She moves and throws things out! thats her way of cleaning. Disney...they have a no nagging policy?? Since when? I thought I was nagging when I was trying to get you all to "lets GO people"! My goodness I was in a hurry and you all wanted to shop to get me something so you wouldn't loose me or something. Jeese!