Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Monday, September 29, 2008

The End and advice for the ignorant

Well, tomorrow's my last day at work! It's been a long couple months while I waited for this day to come. I'll be one of those people that walks out of the building with a few tears in my eyes and a big grin on my face. The tears are for my coworkers that I'm leaving behind (or who are also laid off) and the grin is knowing I'll never have to talk to rude people via online chat again!

Just think, I'll never have to talk to an ignorant asshole on the Internet who thinks the customer is always right and that it's OK to treat me like a piece of shit just because I'm an anonymous person he will never meet. Especially when he's the F'ing idiot who somehow has figured out how to enter his credit card number, name and address but can't figure out how to click the Play button located just under the Buy Button.

I won't have to be polite to someone who insults me and demands a refund in the same sentence - I never did understand this. Wouldn't you be nice to the person who controls whether or not you receive a refund?

I won't have to listen to customers tell me how I am a stupid lying thieving cunt (all in CAPS) who doesn't know how to create a product that works well for them when in actuality I am merely a third party who does not make policies or design sites and they're stupid for not seeing the big bold words "Our content is not compatible with Macs." Nope, no more wasting my time while reading a elitist chat from someone who insists I should give him store credit to make up for this inconvenience. I don't care that 10% of the worlds computer users are Mac owners or that you think you're better than everyone else, you're not! I'm sorry, but if your friends and family aren't going to tell you, I will. Nothing about owning a Mac makes you superior! Now shut up, put down your non-fat mocha frap and just drive your little Prius away from me!

And just a thought, threatening me with the Attorney General does nothing to help your case! Seriously! The Attorney General DOES NOT CARE. Read the Terms and Conditions you agreed to when making your purchase! In fact, threatening me with any sort of legal action is just dumb and takes the wind out of your argument.

Oh yeah - read the damn FAQ before you buy something! You only have yourself to blame if you don't read the FAQ before entering your precious credit card details and making a purchase! You should be ashamed to contact us four months later and demand a refund for a purchase that our system supposedly billed you for without your permission. Like we magically acquired your credit card information and billed you! PULEASE!

Oh and while I'm bitching, here's a tip for you: if you want something from any sort of customer service person, don't lie! We know when you're lying but are just too polite to point it out. If you tell the truth we'll give you what you want. It's sooooo simple!

So. I expect tomorrow to be a good day, even if a bit sad. I'll be the one burning rubber while driving out of the parking lot.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Frogging a cable

This is what it looks like when a knitter is overly confident and decides to rip out six rows of a cable.

Update: It got worse before it got better. But it looks great and I finished the hat. Yay!

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Hole in the Wall

I stumbled upon this show last week and almost didn't watch it because I thought it was some sci-fi program. It turned out to be the American version of a popular Japanese game show, Hole in the Wall. I watched, stunned to see people dressed in shiny silver spandex. And let's face it, it may be even a bit more intriguing than the original considering there are a lot of us Americans who shouldn't be anywhere near spandex.


My intention isn't to be cruel but let's face it. Most of us know our limits. Others will push them for 30 minutes on prime time and a few thousand dollars.

The goal is to fit through a hole in the wall that is moving towards you. These holes are not shaped for normal people, let alone those who should not wear spandex.

The shapes may range from workable to ridiculous. And when they don't fit (not if, when), the wall breaks apart and they fall into a pool of water.

Another reason to not be caught dead wearing silver spandex. It's not flattering from any angle. You can ask Faythe about the camel toe she saw. On a man.

I expect to find much more crap like this to watch in the near future, considering I'm getting layed off on Tuesday. OH MY GOD I'M SO HAPPY.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Happy times at Mom's

Mom gave Apollo the keys to her four wheeler and he turned into a little kid. He drove that thing around as much as he could every day. It was fun watching him enjoy himself as he drove through the fields and back and forth on the road. Aimee caught up with him in the driveway and gave him a bad time about his do-rag flapping in the wind behind him. If you look closely, you can see Aimee demonstrating the flapping.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Station wagons

I don't like station wagons. I saw one today and it reminded me of the one we rode in with our dog, family and all our possessions across the US in a desperate attempt at a new life. Only, this one had shiny spinners and a bright blue paint job. A mohawked 20-something with tattoo sleeves sat in it, carelessly flipping his cigarette ashes out the window. Somehow, he was cooler than me.

It reminded me of the night we slept at a rest stop on our way to Texas. Mom slept outside of the car, Aimee, Sandy and I inside. We didn't get much sleep since Sandy stood guard over us, barking all night at the cement mixer parked near by. Once we got to Texas, we moved around a bit before living with my aunt and uncle who weren't allowed to have a dog, let alone three adults, two children and a newborn baby in a one bedroom apartment. So, poor Sandy lived in the car. We walked him several times a day and visited him as much as possible. Still, I think of how it must have been hell for him. He barked constantly at strangers and lived only for those moments my sister and I, only 7 and 8, visited him.

Unfortunately, as a pure bred Cocker Spaniel, Sandy developed constant ear infections and some sort of nail issue with every foot. He needed surgery and considering we couldn't even afford our own place, Mom gave him away. Well, that's what we thought anyway. A few years ago, we found out she had him euthanized.

So yeah. I don't really like station wagons.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

16 days

In a couple weeks I can tell you what's going on in my life. Meanwhile, my boss is traveling internationally on business and I'm left to monitor the crew. Of course I can't really do anything if they behave badly, other than call them out on it, so their bad behavior continues. (If it were me, at least three of them would have been fired already.) I really can't stand it when people lie about the hours they work or under perform and then act shocked and angry when I bring it to their attention. I'd prefer people just be honest about it rather than play mind games. I've passed on information about their issues but meanwhile, I'm doing what I can do to hold it together. I have all these other things going on at the same time. I keep telling myself, two more weeks.

Two.More.Weeks.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

I'm such a good daughter!

In response to my two readers confirming an interest in Mom having her own blog, Mom has asked us to wait until Christmas and she will just send out her Christmas newsletter instead. I'm sure it will be include the usual photos including rifle poses next to dead animals. You know, Christmasy stuff.

Like all good daughters, I ignored her and created a blog where I will write (not for her or in her stead) all about the craziness that comes when my extended family is involved. Aimee (my sis) and Faythe will also contribute. Be sure to check out the Red Circle of Death for upcoming stories.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Faythe wants Mom to have her own blog, what do you think?

This is the sort of thing I see when I open documents attached to Mom's emails.

Mom sent me a photo of bear poop. Yes. I come from a family that finds it important to be educated about all the different poops of the world. Sure, this came in handy for our ancestors who, for safety and food, needed to know what animal had been in the area and when. I live in San Diego, half a block from Starbucks and Walgreens.

There are four different bears hanging out at Mom's. Some of them are brave enough to visit during the day and ignore barking dogs or the banging of pots and pans. Mom's response is to salivate.

Which means I'll probably have a good "Bear in the Freezer" story for you soon. Run bear, run!!

Changes

I remember when we had to use real mail to communicate with friends and family, we said "Hello" in our letters and everyone used a payphone to reach their friends when they weren't at home.

I feel old.

Thursday, September 04, 2008

I lost a cat!

Did I mention that I lost 16.5 pounds? I know, right?? All just from eating healthy too! I'm so happy, I can't believe I've done it over just two and a half months. Even better, today I realized that with Simba weighing in at 14 pounds, I've lost the equivalent of one large cat! I picked him up and held him on my belly just to get an idea of what I lost - amazing! I never realized fat was so furry.

Hopefully I'll get to the point where I won't feel like I have to hide out of embarrassment of my weight. It's already cost me one traveling opportunity. Or at least my fear of being fat in a foreign country has.


Speaking of Simba, this is what he looks like when he's acting suspicious or thinking of doing something he shouldn't be doing. He's still not allowed in the bedroom without supervision and usually has this look on his face if we catch him there. He doesn't even try to hide anymore, he runs out of the bedroom as soon as we snap our fingers and say "out" while pointing to the door.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Summer of Love Lace

There's a lot going on in my personal life and at work that I can't talk about right now. Give me about a month and I'll spill everything. Meanwhile, I leave you with a pair of socks I completed on Monday for my Aunt.

They're Summer of Love Lace in Artisan Sock Yarn Denim Blues. The cuff is knit flat then joined with some ribbing underneath to keep the sock up. The last photo shows what it looks like with the cuff flipped up. They're much easier to knit than you would think and don't require any picking up of stitches.