The End and advice for the ignorant

Well, tomorrow's my last day at work! It's been a long couple months while I waited for this day to come. I'll be one of those people that walks out of the building with a few tears in my eyes and a big grin on my face. The tears are for my coworkers that I'm leaving behind (or who are also laid off) and the grin is knowing I'll never have to talk to rude people via online chat again!

Just think, I'll never have to talk to an ignorant asshole on the Internet who thinks the customer is always right and that it's OK to treat me like a piece of shit just because I'm an anonymous person he will never meet. Especially when he's the F'ing idiot who somehow has figured out how to enter his credit card number, name and address but can't figure out how to click the Play button located just under the Buy Button.

I won't have to be polite to someone who insults me and demands a refund in the same sentence - I never did understand this. Wouldn't you be nice to the person who controls whether or not you receive a refund?

I won't have to listen to customers tell me how I am a stupid lying thieving cunt (all in CAPS) who doesn't know how to create a product that works well for them when in actuality I am merely a third party who does not make policies or design sites and they're stupid for not seeing the big bold words "Our content is not compatible with Macs." Nope, no more wasting my time while reading a elitist chat from someone who insists I should give him store credit to make up for this inconvenience. I don't care that 10% of the worlds computer users are Mac owners or that you think you're better than everyone else, you're not! I'm sorry, but if your friends and family aren't going to tell you, I will. Nothing about owning a Mac makes you superior! Now shut up, put down your non-fat mocha frap and just drive your little Prius away from me!

And just a thought, threatening me with the Attorney General does nothing to help your case! Seriously! The Attorney General DOES NOT CARE. Read the Terms and Conditions you agreed to when making your purchase! In fact, threatening me with any sort of legal action is just dumb and takes the wind out of your argument.

Oh yeah - read the damn FAQ before you buy something! You only have yourself to blame if you don't read the FAQ before entering your precious credit card details and making a purchase! You should be ashamed to contact us four months later and demand a refund for a purchase that our system supposedly billed you for without your permission. Like we magically acquired your credit card information and billed you! PULEASE!

Oh and while I'm bitching, here's a tip for you: if you want something from any sort of customer service person, don't lie! We know when you're lying but are just too polite to point it out. If you tell the truth we'll give you what you want. It's sooooo simple!

So. I expect tomorrow to be a good day, even if a bit sad. I'll be the one burning rubber while driving out of the parking lot.